I’m still feeling like I’m not good enough for my own life. I’m feeling insecure in my relationships and in my job and in the decisions that I make from day to day.
The problem is, it’s easy to pinpoint when I started feeling inadequate and insecure. I’ve been pretty confident my whole life, and only recently have I been feeling like this.
Even more troubling, it’s easy to point at the people and the events that have caused me doubt and say, “See? It’s their fault.”
While they may have been the catalyst and reason for upset in the past, I’ve allowed myself to be victimized. Whether or not I’m doing it consciously, I’m giving control of how I feel now, to the past.
I know I should retain the lessons that I’ve learned, but I shouldn’t punish myself for them.
With all that being said, it’s much easier to recognize an issue than to fix it… but at least I’m trying. So many people go through their life and are not self-aware, and one thing I’ve worked very hard at is being aware of who I am and what I want to be. I believe strongly that no person should allow another to define them and that every person should be a person of character and integrity.
I’m not there yet, and this may have been a step back in the wrong direction… but it’s not without an epic struggle forward anyway.