It seems that I have somewhat neglected my blogging duties in the last month or so. And the times that I have written anything have been sad or morose or down right depressing. I’m not sure what has changed recently, but I’ve definitely been having trouble seeing the larger picture.
Really, that’s all it takes to stay happy. To see the larger picture and realize that even when things get bad, they can always be worse. Some time ago, I got in to the habit of asking, “Will this matter to me in five years?” whenever something catastrophic (to me) happened.
And you know what? For all the voices in your head that scream like chicken little that the sky is falling, there is very little, if anything, that deserves as much attention as we provide to our problems.
I worry about my job and, while it’s true that losing my job would be bad, it wouldn’t be a catastrophe. I could collect unemployment and look for a better job elsewhere. And while it’s not preferable, I could always take a contract job in Iraq or Afghanistan.
Inevitably, there are the worries about being hurt by those around us; especially those that we love. And it’s true that being hurt leaves us with scars that we’d rather not have, but time heals all wounds (or so they say).
Admittedly, we may be worse for the wear, but in five years it would not be quite as bad as now. We move on, we make do, and we learn from our mistakes.
Honestly, when you think about it, there are very few worries that have any kind of lifetime significance. Everything we typically worry about is basically just fluff.
To bring it down to a very simple and concise point: what in life really matters?
You’ll notice that I didn’t mention electronics, art, houses, or anything in between. I don’t want the latest fashions, and couldn’t care less to look fashionable in any kind of context.
My car isn’t new, but it gets me places reliably and comfortably. My job pays the bills and, while the money isn’t enough at times, from top to bottom, no job (short of being a millionaire) will ever be quite enough. I won’t fret over it.
But the common theme of things that are important? Those that I love. I want to see my father live for another 50 years if he can manage. I would like to some day get married, have kids, a house (owned or rented), and a dog. I would love to spend my weekends doing obscenely normal things, like going to the park with my family or cleaning the gutters.
I want to feel the love of those around me; those that are close and whom I want to keep closest. When we lust after material wealth and possessions, it slowly becomes a race to find the next big thing.
Eventually, people get in to a mentality that the next thing will make them happy and, the truth is, it never does. It never delivers. They spend their lives in longing for an understanding that never comes.
I know, because I’ve been that person. I’ve been there. And I refuse to be one of them again.